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Monday, November 1, 2010

Why I'm Blogging.

I have never felt "healthy". My whole life, I have had issues with being overly tired, easily fatigued, and sometimes just feeling weak in general. I can take a nap every day and I cannot function if I work for more than 6 hours at a time. I have always chalked it up to possible anemia or lack of nutrition because I don't eat green vegetables. I have bought different supplements, vitamins, etc. and some of them have helped. But I still have never just felt "healthy".
Sometimes my blood sugar drops. This has been going on for years. I remember being a child and I'd have to sit down while my mom was curling my hair because I'd get lightheaded. Being an RN, she'd often have a blood sugar tester on hand and she'd test me. It'd be low. She'd give me orange juice and I'd be better. As an adult, I have learned to deal with my symptoms. When I drive or study, I often feel unfocused. Sometimes I feel in a fog or like my eyesight might just blur up. I just feel weak a lot of times.
My metabolism also works very fast. I better have 2 meals in me if I'm going to drink a cup of coffee. And if I'm working out/cleaning house, I'd better have a stash of high calorie/high sugar snacks with me. These are just things I'd learned to do because I just thought it was who I was.
Well, a couple of weeks ago I started having really bad anxiety. It got to the point where I couldn't drive the 2 hours roundtrip to school and had to pull out of my classes. Then I didn't want to go to work. Then I didn't want to go to the grocery store. Or take Abbie to preschool. My anxiety had gotten out of control and I started seeking answers.
It wasn't until weeks later... today, specifically, that I started connecting the things I've been through my whole life: fatigue, weakness, etc. and my anxiety. For weeks, I'd wondered why my body seemed to be shutting down. I couldn't understand why I wasn't being able to handle stress anymore. Why didn't I want to drive anywhere? Or do anything? It never occured to me that I had an underlying condition that might be getting worse and manifesting itself through anxiety, fear, and panic attacks.
But, after weeks of living in my own personal hell, that is what I found this morning. You see, I have spent the last month or more going to doctors, talking to anyone and everyone who might help, and all but going insane. So when God placed some good research and the information for a homeopathic doctor in my lap this morning, I took both.
And I'll talk more about that later. But all of this is why I'm blogging. I'm blogging because, for the last few weeks, I haven't felt like I would ever get my life back. But today I feel like I can see a light at the end of this tunnel. And I want to share what I'm doing, what I've been through, what's working, and what's not.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, sounds very interesting... hurry spill the beans of what you found!